Hello, ooh your honoured, twice in one week, and i am loving your comments about my blog (though most of them i wrote), before i wrote this i wrote another one, not sure what the flip happened, but i pressed 'backspace' to correct it and all that i had written vanished!!!!!!
Have you watched Embarrassing illness's on TV? so so funny and slightly yukky too, i may of mentioned this before, but people have gangrene penis's, pussie vagina's that they have kept secret for near on thousands of years, suddenly a bloody camera crew turn up and people are whopping everything out for the nation to see? i went to the doctors surgery the other day, it was an embarrassing thing i needed to discus, new doctor too, he could see i was having trouble explaining what was wrong, so gently told me it was OK, there was a camera in the corner, and if it helped he would switch it on and we could be live on ITV, well i must say it was such a relief to know there is that service.....i was naked and poised before he had even left his seat!!!.......people all over the world are now washing more frequently, that's all it was, silly me, and i helped in three ways I'm sure of it, firstly that people now wash, secondly that a lot of people were probably dieting and were about to tuck into a naughty cake, and thirdly i reminded them to put 'cheese' on there shopping lists!!!!!
Right now to my training week in oxford, well basically the builders were in and i have a thing for public toilets, they have to be clean, private, and vaguely complete, these were not!! and unfortunately i only have to look at a cup of tea and a need a wee wee, and i only have to have a mouthful of food and need a plop...... these toilets (there were 4) had no loo seats, no toilet paper, no soap, and a menagerie of builders wandering about, also half the dividing walls were missing!!!!! honestly i was so so stressed, and if that wasn't bad enough, women on the course would say 'use ours, i will stand outside and keep guard? ooooh i really don't think so, after lunch every day was horrid i had to ASK someone to let me have a toilet roll out the ladies, which just highlighted i needed a plop, then there toilet was being used so we had to go into the 'lunching' millions and have a whip round for tissues, oh the shame......
Second to last day i saw in the end cubical......a toilet seat, i was so so happy, and after lunch ran up stairs, with a plan to go into cubical 2 to retrieve the toilet paper and then nip to cubical 4..... when i got up there, there were loads of builders, one very Lully one mopping the floor in 2 cubical, as he saw me he said 'alright mate' and 'use one of the other toilets mate cheers' and i completely forgot about needing the fudging toilet paper and marched into 4 and did the biz.......only to find no fucking paper......what now? 1 solo and very snotty tissue in my pocket later.....and i was back in the room telling everyone i had had a plop but forgot the paper so now had a 'snotty botty' .......trauma the whole week, though people did quite like it when i nipped to the toilet, as i came back with such stories........
So there we are, stories told, i guess now i need to go find Tony's tax form, walk willow and get ready for work, its been Lully sharing my stories, i will unload again real soon, i am due to travel on the peasant wagon number 17 bus soon, i do like to have my posher bag on me 'Debenhams, or Whsmiths, most have 'poundland, Wilkinson's, or iceland' bags, and i always always have my street map in my hand....... usually i get on the bus and say 'Is this the bus to blah, and can i pay by card? ooh no? sorry i don't usually travel by bus it's just my SAAB soft top is in the garage being valeted and my chauffeur is unwell today' but that's getting a tad long winded, so now i just carry a posh bag, and map......or wear my decorating clothes? which is OK on the bus (though still a tad smart) but not a good look wandering round house of Fraser!!!!!!
Sp'oon me lovelies, Sp'oon Chal
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